Entitled Mil-Spouses

Let me just tell you that sports programs do something special to people.  Make that youth sports and you have a double concoction of “I want to shoot myself or YOU in the forehead with a high-powered machine gun.”  Add entitled military wife with no effin’ common sense or respect and you may as well have flipped the house over because no one is going to be nice to you anymore.

Dear Entitled Mil-Spouses of the Planet, 
  As a mil-spouse myself, I don’t appreciate your attitude when dealing with the word, “no”.  I don’t appreciate the fact that you berate unsuspecting clerks who don’t have all the answers in the world.  I don’t appreciate that you call me and tell me I haven’t responded to your facebook message in 10 seconds and you need an answer now, you should have called in the first place.  I have tried to remove the comments on facebook, they won’t let me.  I don’t care if you’re brand new to the military or you’ve been here for 19 years, that doesn’t give you the right to treat people (any person, not just those of us in your shoes) like we are less of a person because we work somewhere.  I don’t care who you are or what your last name is, so help me god, if you do it to me, you will regret it.  I won’t scream and cry or threaten violence.  We run some fantastic programs, many of them are free and cost you nothing.  We don’t need you telling us that we suck at something if you haven’t experienced it since a new person has been working in the position.  Oddly enough, we aren’t trying to make your life hell, but if you push us far enough, we will and you’ll never know it.  You’ll blame it on our stupidity and how we don’t know what we’re doing.  What you won’t know is that it was purposeful and we enjoy watching you seethe.  Next time you decide to start being a jackass to someone because you feel that the rank on your house offers you that protection, you should make sure you’re not about to yell at someone who is a personal friend of your direct supervisor.  Better yet, just because you are a mil-spouse doesn’t mean you are afforded the luxury of treating people like they are below you.  You never know who someone is until it’s too late and chances are,  your reputation has preceded you.
                                                           Love, Molly Danger

People are losing their minds.. and it’s making me super hostile.

First off, a services facebook page is ran by folks with JOBS.  We use those sites to provide you with more information because some people will not look out information, they wait for it to be hand delivered to them.  The government frowns on us sitting on facebook all day WAITING for you to comment so we can immediately comment back, sometimes they even block the site.  In that same respect, that means that if we do respond to you at midnight, we are very much NOT at work and probably will not have a conversation with you about said product/service/event/etc and are actually at home trying to finish up on stuff.  Actually, it will most likely piss us off that you keep trying to comment back and get a response.  If you comment on an event on my facebook page for my job and then call me 10 minutes later because you haven’t gotten a response, you’re lucky I don’t show up at your front door and kick you in the teeth.  BE EFFIN’ PATIENT.  If you can’t be patient, CALL the PHONE number LISTED on the PAGE.  OMMFG.

Secondly, throwing a hand written required document (that is not generally handwritten) at the front desk clerks of a services facility and stomping off while asking questions you are OBVIOUSLY not waiting for an answer for, might just get your document shredded.  We have a crosscut shredder, there will be absolutely no proof you ever gave it to us and you will have to produce another one.  Sorry BOUTCHA.

Third, don’t walk up to me and act like you are the most important person on the planet and demand answers.  My very first question for you will be, “Did you check your email?”  If you answer is no, I will respond with when I sent the e-mail to publicly make you look like a jackass and then go print the email for you since you’re apparently incapable of functioning without people handing everything to you.  The same thing applies when I am running around like a chicken with my head cut off, except I won’t print the email, I’ll wheel off what I remember and run off.  I am not on YOUR schedule, you’re on MINE.  If the words, I’m sorry “I’ll check later” or “I’m in ratio and can’t do that right now”, or better yet, “she’s not here today” are vocalized, it’s not going to happen today/right now/possibly never.  And the correct response to the latter is not, “well, can you call her?”  ABSO-EFFIN’-LUTELY NOT. 

Fourth, if we tell you there isn’t any space available in a program/league/field trip/etc.  We aren’t lying.  According to our records, there is no space.  No, we will not take another bus, add another class, or add another team.  Most of the time we don’t have the staffing, ability, or coaches to do those.  So you know what?  You can seriously kiss our ass.  If a contract instructor’s classes fill up, tough shit.  If a sports league fills up and you ask AFTER registration ends after going on for a month for a slot and there aren’t any, tough shit.  We’re not in the business of making things up.  If we don’t know the answer, we don’t know it.  If we tell you no because there isn’t space, the final answer is NO.

Finally, if I tell you that your son’s shoes are too big to play soccer in, I’m not kidding, he’s going to hurt himself and I won’t refund your money for that one.  If I tell you that I need a document, I’m not kidding.  If I tell you that you must make payment by x day or your first shirt will be notified, I’m really not kidding.  I don’t give a damn who your husband is unless he controls my pay rate and then in that case, I’d like to meet him.  Don’t ask me if I know who your husband is, there is a 50% chance I’ll say yes and still don’t give a shit.  Don’t tell me how to run my program or roster my teams, I went to college for this and you barely finished high school.  And for the record, I won’t change your child’s team or class because your friend is on another team.  You should have put that on the special requests line on the registration form and I would have been able to accommodate that.  Oh and I won’t give you the roster because I don’t pass them out, I don’t think it’s fair to pass out everyone’s personal information to anyone.  Too bad.

Calling me and demanding things will get you nowhere.  It’s my program, it works, people like it and me usually, and it makes money.  Get over yourself and stop being a douchebag.  We are all people too and you’re not more special than anyone else, don’t treat us like we are a high school kid who is just learning our jobs.  Plus, you should really be nicer to high school kids, just because they mess something up doesn’t give you the right to lay into them like you do.  No one likes a douchebag.

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